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Space suits, Coupons and Data Crunching

Hold on to your horses, here’s what’s going on in the world of tech.

The Z-2 space suit.  (NASA)

The Z-2 space suit. (NASA)

NASA unveils a new space suit designed for the exploration of Mars. Scientists are going for a fashion-trendy suit that will help astronauts identify each other while checking out the red planet. Because it’s going to be challenging to distinguish other human beings from all the big brown rocks.

Time Warner announces to customers that starting Jan. 31st, it will eliminate personal web pages for standard users. People who pay more money to use a different service will continue to receive hosting. This comes as a shock to the whole world that such a nice business would make such a cold-hearted move.

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The not-for-profit group O.U.R. (Operation Underground Railroad) announces new technological developments to combat human trafficking. The group, made up of ex-Navy SEALs, CIA, Special Forces, and law enforcement is an effort to rescue the 2.4 million people worldwide being held as slaves, 80 percent of which are women and children kidnapped for the sex trade. Devices such as software that detects the location of rape videos as they are uploaded to the internet, Google Glass filming rescue operations as they happen to create awareness, and “text to donate” programs are just a few tools being used in this fight. See OurRescue.org for more info.

Bugs Bunny this means warTwitter buys “Gnip” (pronounced “please pass the salt”) – a social data crunching company that provides an auto-analysis of what people are saying online in order for businesses to develop their products to make the most money. Experts say it’s just a random “keep up appearances” move to buy a new tech company in response to Facebook buying stuff all the time. After Facebook’s Instagram killed Twitter’s Vine, “of course, you know – this means war.” – Bugs Bunny

Unroll.me is a service that offers users a one-click stop to immediately unsubscribe from all the random crap that gets emailed to them on a regular basis. You select what cyber-mail you no longer want to receive. Don’t forget to stay subscribed to your e-bills. #coveringyourass #figurativelyspeaking

Snap-ItSnipSnap gets noticed as the new couponing app for “never forgetting your coupons.” Now you can still enjoy cutting your coupons out but with one “snap” this app auto-stores your coupons in your smartphone, reminds you when they are going to expire, are fully usable at the checkout, and you can connect with friends to see what they are “snipping.” Folks are just waiting for an app that allows you to not have to cut out coupons in the first place. Experts are saying “Just make exorbitant amounts of money.”

Scientists are inventing a new cool tool to discover stuff. Car keys, Noah’s ark, a cure for cancer, and Jimmy Hoffa are high on the list. Okay, no, they’re not.

iPhone 6 rumors circulating include: an all-flat large screen front; a large screen TV instead of a phone that you carry around on your shoulder like a boom box; no screen at all and doesn’t even make phone calls (not even “911”); and a projector so you can watch movies in your own home without ever buying a TV.

Some Local Folks and Their Favorite Tech

“My iPhone is definitely my favorite,” says Kim Brown, “It’s my third arm.”

“My Galaxy S3 smartphone because, though not perfect, I could do anything I had to on it.” – Mitch Mitchell

@Ahalogy. I use #pinterest a lot and it helps me schedule my pins at the best times.” – Lauren Greutman (@IAmThatLady)

A Few Other Cool Tech-ish Movies Coming Out in the Semi-Near Future

Warner Brothers brings on Zack Snyder of the upcoming “Batman vs. Superman” film to direct “The Justice League” featuring the “magnificent seven” super heroes including Batman, Superman, Wonder Woman, The Green Lantern, Flash, and some other guys we don’t really care about. It is expected to release no sooner than 2018. Fans have already started camping out to get ready to camp out to get tickets.

Sylvester Stallone brings back his friends along with a few dozen other old people in “The Expendables 3” coming out this August 15th. Notable additions are Mel Gibson and (the great) Harrison Ford. #seeingatrend? What does that have to do with tech? “They’ve got guns!” – Indiana Jones in the lesser- known Ford TV show appearance.

“24” which was set to have become a movie, just re-released for a new 12-show real-time season. “Jack is back!” Twitter hasn’t been this “TV show hyper” since #BreakingBad. “Dammit Chloe!” The season is entitled “Live Another Day” after Jack has been in hiding off the grid for the last four years along with the rest of the cast’s acting careers. Let’s see who dies this time.

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Joe Cunningham

A former Internet Marketing Manager, Joe Cunningham is a screenwriter, playwright and all-around adventurer. He blogs for Kinani Blue, charms Google at Terakeet and enjoys running through the city. You can follow him on Twitter at @IndianaJoe77 or he can be reached at indianajoe77@gmail.com.

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