Curses, Foiled Again

When Jonathon Michael Smith, 22, tried to buy a $28,000 pickup truck with a check, the manager of the Ford dealership in Fairbanks, Alaska, became suspicious. He checked with another car dealer and found Smith had used a forged check to buy a vehicle there. In fact, he’d used forged checks to buy two other trucks, all this year. According to court documents, Smith forged all four checks using copies he downloaded from an online blog. All the checks had blurry printing, inconsistent fonts and lacked routing and account numbers. Police Officer Jim O’Malley, who responded to the Ford dealership, already knew Smith and asked him what he was doing. He said Smith replied that he was “being stupid.” (Daily News-Miner)

Curses, Foiled Again

Police arrested a 17-year-old boy in College Station, Texas, for trying to pass a counterfeit $5 bill. Officials said the bogus bill had an “overwhelming number of imperfections,” appearing to have been made by gluing two sheets of paper together with images of the front and back of a $5 bill printed on either side. Further evidence that the bill consisted of two pieces of paper cropped and glued together was the observation that the front of the bill was longer than the back. (The Eagle)

Curses, Foiled Again

Police captured Juventino Sanchez Jr., 57, who they said tried to break into a bank in Topeka, Kan., but got stuck in a rooftop exhaust vent and had to hang upside-down for as long as four hours. The Topeka Capital-Journal reported that police learned of his predicament when his daughter called to say she received word that her father was trapped from a family member who had reached him by cell phone. Firefighters used ropes to pull Sanchez out of the vent feet first.

Curses, Foiled Again

A man robbing his elderly victim in San Diego took exception when a bystander interrupted the crime and punched the robber in the face. The robber responded by calling the police to report the assault. When officers showed up, they arrested the 43-year-old caller. (San Diego Union-Tribune)

Police had little trouble finding two men who robbed a convenience store in Catawba County, N.C. The suspects called the police shortly after their getaway to request help with a flat tire. One of the officers recognized the men from a surveillance video of the robbery and arrested Mark Franklin, 46, and James Jennings, 31. (Charlotte Observer)

A carjacking victim told authorities in Hayward, Calif., that his attacker choked him, drove off, then returned and resumed choking him until a witness intervened. Alameda County sheriff’s investigators immediately identified Ali Kimia, 32, as the suspect when witness and victim both mentioned the tattoos on his forehead. One over his right eye reads, “Why,” and one over his left eye reads, “Try.” (San Francisco Chronicle)

Curses, Foiled Again

Police said Raul Gaucin-Valenzuela, 33, and a friend broke into a home in Evans, Colo., intending to beat up the friend’s ex-wife’s new boyfriend. The plan failed because the woman living there was baby-sitting Gaucin-Valenzuela’s two children, ages 8 and 11, who recognized their dad, even though a bandanna covered his face. Police said Gaucin-Valenzuela didn’t realize his kids were at the home. (Greeley Daily Tribune)

After recognizing themselves in a surveillance video on TV, two women went to the police station in DeLand, Fla., and, according to sheriff’s official Brandon Haught, “wanted to know what is going on.” Investigators stepped in and determined from the video that the women were at a beauty store when it was robbed and one of them, Myesha Williams, 20, committed the robbery. (Daytona Beach News-Journal)

When a man and a woman tried to sell a ring to a jewelry store in Joplin, Mo., owner L.T. Newton recognized it as stolen and called the police. Officers couldn’t find the ring on either suspect, but while questioning the man, he began to cough uncontrollably and eventually coughed up the ring, which he had swallowed. (The Joplin Globe)

Curses, Foiled Again

After robbers used heavy metal drain covers to smash their way into a Welsh bank in Cardiff and make off with $171,156, police quickly identified the culprits because a witness remembered the personalized license plate—“J4MES”—on the sporty blue BMW used as the getaway vehicle. Police found James Snell, 27, and his brother Wayne, 34, holding more than $48,944 of the loot and rounded up the rest of the gang. “It was the distinctiveness of the car which contributed to the robbers’ undoing,” prosecutor Daniel Williams said. (The Daily Telegraph)

Curses, Foiled Again

Two masked men armed with a shotgun tried to rob a bagel shop in Orlando, Fla., but fled empty handed when one of the employees pushed a bagel cart at them.

After stealing handcuffs, a Taser and other items from an unmarked police car in Ocoee, Fla., Shane Thomas Williams-Allen, 19, was apprehended when he “locked the handcuffs on himself and had to call the Clermont Police Department to respond to release him,” according to an arrest affidavit. Lake County authorities who took Williams-Allen into custody said he told them that while removing the Taser from the police car, “it discharged, hitting the floor and causing his foot to get shocked.” 

Mother’s Day Edition

Curses, Foiled Again

Tita Nyambi, 25, tried to withdraw $700 from his mother’s bank account by dressing in the woman’s clothes and speaking in a high-pitched voice, according to authorities in Somerset County, N.J., who added that he also presented her driver’s license and forged her signature on a bank form at the bank’s drive-through teller. Newark’s Star-Ledger said bank personnel immediately saw through the deception and called police, who responded while Nyambi was waiting for the money.