Curses, Foiled Again
Police arrested convicted cockfighter Danny Pham, 36, for violating his parole after he showed up at the post office in Lake Worth, Fla., to claim a live rooster delivered through the mail. Pham insisted the bird in the box was “not his chicken” and that he was “picking it up for a friend.” Palm Beach County sheriff’s deputies found 89 roosters in cages in Pham’s backyard. (The Palm Beach Post)
A gunman entered a London bank and ordered the teller to put 700,000 pounds ($1.1 million) in a bag. Only instead of giving the cashier the bag, the robber held onto it and handed him his gun. He quickly realized his mistake, but before he could grab it back, the teller had time to activate the bank’s security shutters, locking out the suspect and leaving him empty-handed, except for a bank worker’s bicycle, which he stole for his escape. (Britain’s The Telegraph)
Supply-Side Economics
As part of the Obama administration’s “Campaign to Cut Waste,” the U.S. Mint all but halted production of $1 coins bearing the likeness of dead presidents, even though the Presidential $1 Coin Act of 2005 requires the Mint to issue four new coins a year through 2016. A few coins will still be minted for collectors, but the cutback will save $50 million a year in production and storage costs, according to officials, who said lack of demand led to nearly 40 percent of coins already minted being returned to the Federal Reserve. “The call for Chester A. Arthur coins is not there,” Vice President Joseph R. Biden said. (The Washington Post)
Culinary Capers
Up to a third of customers at a Chinese restaurant at North Carolina’s Duke University welcomed half-sized portions of rice and noodles, even when they cost the same as full-sized portions, according to researchers led by Tulane University psychologist Janet Schwartz. Citing the study and his own research into smaller portions, Cornell University’s Brian Wansink predicted, “We’re seeing some very creative ways of downsizing in the next couple of years.” (Associated Press)
A man in his 40s was dining at the Heart Attack Grill in downtown Las Vegas when he suffered an apparent heart attack. While eating a “Triple Bypass Burger,” he began sweating and shaking and could barely talk, according to owner “Doctor” Jon Basso, who insisted the episode was not a publicity stunt. There have been a “variety of incidents” in the past, he said, but this was the first full-scale coronary. An amateur video shows paramedics wheeling the man from the restaurant to an ambulance. He was hospitalized but survived.
The restaurant, whose “Quadruple Bypass Burger” boasts 8,000 calories and “Flatliner Fries” are cooked in lard, advises patrons, “Caution! This establishment is bad for your health.” Customers weighing more than 350 pounds eat free. (Las Vegas’ KVVU-TV)
When Guns Are Outlawed
Fred Parker, 41, walked into a gambling parlor in Sharon, Pa., began touching the walls and gambling machines, then announced he has MRSA, a serious staph infection that resists antibiotics. Police said Parker threatened to infect the cashier unless he gave Parker money. When the cashier refused, Parker left empty-handed but was arrested a short time later. “It’s our first case of robbery by threat of infectious disease,” police Chief Mike Menster noted. (Sharon’s The Herald)
Claim Game
A federal judge in New York City ordered the maker of Fresh Step cat litter to stop showing a television commercial that makes “insufficiently reliable” claims about the product’s ability to handle smells. Judge Jed S. Rakoff called the comparison tests depicted in the ads insufficiently true to the real-life habits of cats. (The New York Times)
The Atlanta-based fast-food chain Chick-fil-A demanded that Vermont folk artist Bo Muller-Moore, 38, stop using the slogan “eat more kale” on bumper stickers and T-shirts to promote local agriculture because it comes too close to the company’s slogan, “eat mor chikin.” A letter from a Chick-fil-A lawyer said Muller-Moore’s message “is likely to cause confusion of the public and dilutes the distinctiveness of Chick-fil-A’s intellectual property and diminishes its value.” Muller-Moore’s lawyer, Daniel Richardson disagreed, observing, “I don’t think anyone will step forward and say they bought an ‘eat more kale’ shirt thinking it was a Chick-fil-A product.” (Associated Press)
Reasonable Explanation
Police investigating reports of a man handcuffed inside a car outside a drugstore in Uniontown, Pa., found Stephen M. Carr, 28, “wearing makeup, female eyeglasses, a female shirt, female pants, stockings and high heels” A chain around his neck was secured with a lock and led behind the driver’s seat, where it was attached to Carr’s ankles with handcuffs. Officers said Carr told them “he came to Walgreens to get his wife a drink, and being dressed like a woman is hard to just walk into the store. So he chained up/restrained himself to build himself up to going into the store dressed like a woman to get his wife a drink.” (Pittsburgh Tribune-Review)
911 Follies
Police arrested Joan Mayo in St. Cloud, Fla., after she called 911 six times but wouldn’t say why. She screamed obscenities at dispatchers and berated them, declaring the nature of her emergency was “none of your business. Just send me a sergeant.” When responding officers warned her not to abuse the emergency number, she told them she had no regard for the 911 system and would call whenever she wanted to. Neighbor Lillian Morales explained, “She just wanted cigarettes.” (Orlando’s WFTV-TV)
Police arrested John R. Pacella, 38, in Willowbrook, Ill., after they said he called 911and announced he “wanted to see an officer because he wanted to fight with them.” (Chicago Tribune)
Prioritizing
Kentucky Gov. Steve Beshear proposed cutting $50 million in education spending in the state’s new budget while preserving $43 million in tax breaks for the Ark Encounter, an amusement park that features a life-sized Noah’s Ark and promotes a literal interpretation of the Book of Genesis. (Forbes)
Second-Amendment Follies
Robbie Ostberg, 14, was playing with a six-inch-long toy cannon when it fired some sort of projectile into the boy’s face, killing him. “It’s not intended to be used to fire anything,” Tremonton, Utah, police Chief Dave Nance said. “It’s just intended to be looked at.” (Salt Lake City’s KTVX-TV)
Seemed Like a Good Idea At the Time
Seven hundred people had to be evacuated in Stockholm after a youth hostel caught fire. Fire investigators said the blaze started after the hostel staff placed several mattresses in the hostel’s sauna and turned up the heat to try to delouse them. (Sweden’s The Local)
Nine people attending a personal development seminar titled “Dying in Consciousness” outside Drummondville, Quebec, were covered with mud, wrapped in plastic, put under blankets and immobilized with their heads in cardboard boxes for nine hours with instructions to hyperventilate. The body of Chantale Lavigne, 35, was removed after being “cooked to death,” according to coroner Gilles Sainton. Another woman was hospitalized but survived. (Canada’s National Post)
News and Blues is compiled from the nation’s press. To contribute, submit original clippings, citing date and source, to Roland Sweet in care of The New Times.
