The Parent Trap

Alec Baldwin is not alone. I would not
call him angry, but correctly frustrated with a system that treats men
as second-class citizens once a wife (by 70 percent) decides to divorce
their spouse. It is a shame, but fathers, post-separation and divorce,
are being thrown out of kids’ lives. They even have a new name for
fathers after divorce and it is not parent, but “visitor.” Uncles
visit, not fathers.

Our country is now a country of kids
raised without dads. Alec Baldwin should be applauded, not ridiculed,
for trying to help change that, and it is great to see President Obama
highlighting the role of father and family. 

According to the Centers for Disease
Control, back in the 1960s about 9 percent of kids were raised without
dads in the house. Today that number is 28 percent—more than 20 million
kids. This bubble of kids without dads has resulted in a bubble of teen
pregnancy, a bubble of teen violence and a bubble of teen alcohol and
drug abuse.

Parental alienation is alive and well
and it is supported by out-of-date child custody laws that do not allow
for equally shared parenting after separation and divorce as well as
arcane family and probate courts that reduce fathers to visitors or
even less. The divorce industry is huge and many cannot get by without
lawyers who charge anywhere from $250 to $500 or more, along with
special masters and therapists, leaving many fathers dead broke—yet we
label them as deadbeat. Just manipulation of the truth.

No one is perfect, including Alec
Baldwin. But one can tell from his determination that he loves his
daughter, despite his frustrated phone call. It does not mean he is a
bad dad and should not parent his child. Alec Baldwin had the guts and
the ability to tell us how he felt and how many fathers and even some
mothers feel. Parental alienation is alive and well and as long as
courts allow it to occur, that 28 percent of kids without dads will
continue to grow. This growth is at our nation’s peril for it tears at
the fabric of family and society.

—Dr. Peter Hill

Weston, Mass.