Speed Racer

Vrrroooom service: Emile Hirsch as Speed Racer.

Although the nation’s cinema scribes marched in lockstep with the incorrect public relations that declared Speed Racer as the earliest example of anime, conveniently forgetting that Astro Boy
came first, the Wachowskis’ biggest problem is one of excess, of not
knowing when to quit. At one point the fraternal filmmakers build to an
ultimate car race, with bad guys, ninjas and our heroes bopping each
other in what appears to be a Road Warrior-inspired climax—until it’s
revealed that another crucial race must transpire, too, which adds another half-hour to this movie’s running time.

Despite its formidable length, however, Speed Racer
lives up to its title, with plenty of eye candy on hand to keep matters
from bogging down. It feels like an entire season of episodic
television in one fell swoop, the type of exacting homage you’d expect
from fanboys who have been given more than $100 million and technical
geegaws galore to play with. 

There’s a plot, not that it matters: Speed (Emile Hirsch)
says a polite no to an offer of corporate sponsorship from megalomaniac
Royalton (Roger Allam), who doesn’t take refusal lightly. Also on the
premises: John Goodman and Susan Sarandon as Speed’s parents; Paulie
Litt as kid brother Spritle (accompanied by his pet chimp Chim Chim);
Christina Ricci, copping a retro Natalie Wood vibe as Trixie; and Lost’s
Matthew Fox as the mysterious Racer X, whose secret identity might fool
the tiniest of tots. They all keep a straight face, too, as they play
their earnest roles in front of the green-screen process while trying
not to get lost amid the post-production special effects. 

There are some deliberate laughs, such as a montage that
crosscuts between the Royalton faction dining on swanky fare and Mom
Racer coordinating an assembly line of PB&J sandwiches, as well as
a cameo by original Speed Racer voice Peter Fernandez, an appearance by
Shaft’s Richard Roundtree that will elicit a what-the-f***
response from admirers, and some darkly comic moments involving machine
guns and a tank of piranha. Yet Speed Racer’s place in movie
history just might be a result of its all-out visual assault, in which
viewers must either viscerally connect to the kinetic tapestry, or else
pull over to the side of the road. The cinematic shape of things to
come? Maybe, although it’s heartening to note that the kids in the
audience laughed hardest when a crime-cartel cretin got a face full of
monkey poop. 

—Bill DeLapp