The Tiger Woods saga shows how extreme the lines between

public and private have become

I may be in the minority, but I think that this week Tiger Woods has become more of a role model than ever before. By not talking to the media or anyone else about whatever happened at the perimeter of his front yard, Woods reminds us that at times the most appropriate answer to a question is “none of your business.” It is way past time for a return to some sort of line between the public and the private.

We already know too much about Tiger Woods’ little double bogey. There’s a busted fire hydrant, a damaged tree, a foxy wife with a golf club and a smashed-up car missing a few windows. It’s a formula the cable maniacs can’t get enough. It’s O.J.’s slow-motion car chase, Michael Jackson’s corpse being slid into the ambulance, the countless stakeouts at countless venues played out between commercial breaks that America’s eyes have been glued to for too long.

The legal shows, the sports shows, even those that claim to be news shows, just keep flashing the same images and inviting the same talking heads to speculate endlessly about the meaning of the few pieces of information they can get their hands on.

I say we’ve already heard too much. The cable clowns seem incapable of distinguishing between genuine news and something that just happens to have happened in the vicinity of someone famous. I hope that Tiger never mentions what happened that night. Ever. His silence reminds us that you have the right, in this country, to remain silent, and that in many cases, we would be better off if that right were exercised more liberally. He is under no obligation to give an interview to the police. He is under no obligation to talk to Judge Judy or Keith Olbermann or anyone else.

Tiger Woods is a golfer, probably the best one ever born. Turns out he’s better with a
driver in his hand than sitting in the driver’s seat. Yeah, it was 2 a.m.; yeah, the papers say he has a girlfriend, blah blah blah. We should care about him as a golfer, and leave him and his family to sort out the rest. We have the right to ask him about his golfing. 

Remember, Tiger, that you have the right to ignore the spin-meisters, the overmatched legal minds, the judges, juries and executioners waiting to take you down for no reason at all other than that they can. Tiger Woods didn’t shoot anyone in the face, like Dick Cheney. Didn’t shoot himself in the leg like Plaxico Burress. Didn’t even get charged with murder like O.J. Simpson. There’s no crime here, no charges filed, nobody hurt except the golfer himself, and his family.

Just leave it alone. Turn your head away. Get some perspective. We need to stop confusing being informed citizens with just being peeping toms. This has gone on at least since the Clinton years, and it is no trivial thing. A nation that can’t distinguish what’s really important from what’s just titillating might soon find itself unable to confront real dangers. 

The Monica Lewinsky scandal was to the private lives of public figures what the Hubble telescope has been to the far regions of the universe. Bill Clinton’s most serious mistake wasn’t offering Monica a cigar; it was in answering questions about the affair in the first place. Had the president simply said “next question” we might have not wasted the last half of the 1990s dithering about who the president was diddling.

(Note to the fame wanna-bes: If you are considering sneaking into a state dinner at the White House or sending your kid aloft in a helium balloon just to enter the ranks of the famous, please consider the fact that you might succeed, and then you may no longer be able to drive your oversized car recklessly on your own lawn without the whole world finding out about it.) 

Is it any wonder that our kids have difficulty separating achievement from notoriety? With all the unjustified frenzy, Woods has dropped out of his own charity tournament and says he won’t play golf for the rest of the year. That’s a loss for all of us, whether we follow golf or not. 

Last August Tiger came to town to play in the Notah Begay III charity tournament at Atunyote Golf Course at the Turning Stone Resort and Casino. Maybe we can entice him to come back. Central New York could start a national trend here. Let’s make a pledge that if he comes, we won’t ask him about his car wreck. We’ll ask him about his golf, and let him keep his private life private. We have more important things to worry about.