All articles by Jeff Kramer

Continuing the Hirsute Pursuit

Jeff Kramer won’t give up on his plea for hair

What a town this is! There are walks and runs for every imaginable malady and cause. There are pancake breakfasts, fish fries and bake sales. High school kids stand on corners, hawking car washes to pay for band trips and sports programs.

Questionable Content = Evasive Answers

There’s no such thing as a stupid question?

Billions and billions of years ago, Carl Sagan asserted that there’s no such thing as a stupid question.

A Hair-Raising Experience

The first publicly owned hair transplant in American history

A few weeks ago, I announced that I’d be visiting the Great Doctor Kim, who operates an amazing, new (to this area) anti-baldness machine. Good to my word, I have since consulted the Harvard-educated healer and his crackerjack staff at the Natural Face Center in East Syracuse. Suddenly, my future looks shiny and bright.

Pedal Pushers Born to be Mild

Kramer takes on the Five Boro Bike Tour

Way back in February 1977, a small group of New York City cycling enthusiasts had a dream. They would launch a ride across the city that would become so popular that a Marriott in the Financial District would be able to gouge guests $20 per night to store a bicycle in a nearby garage.

Searching for the Hair Apparent

Give Jeff Back His Hair!

As I watched the Bruce Jenner interview, I felt happy for him. Finally, Jenner can be the person he knew he always was. I only wish he’d outed himself as a transgender person sooner, for his sake and the sake of others.

A Dip Celebrates Earth Day

Proving to the world that Onondaga Lake is safe for swimming

County Executive Joanie Mahoney said she’d swim in Onondaga Lake.

Poetic License to Kill

April is National Poetry Month

April is National Poetry Month, but before you stop reading, just hear me out. A lot of poetry is actually interesting. Or, barring that, here are some recent news events in our area that I’ve turned into verse in an homage to National Poetry Month:

An Indiana Jones for Homo Sweet Home

Is Indiana the gayest state in the Union?

Homophobes always make me suspicious that they’re gay. Don’t misunderstand. I don’t mean to imply that every black-hearted gay basher sneaks off to Bear Week in Provincetown or secretly knows the Cole Porter songbook by heart.

Time to play MARCH BADNESS

Whoever picks the winning bracket wins $25

Yes, Syracuse, there is an NCAA tournament. Sensing a void in the calendar, I’ve assembled a bracket featuring the best of the worst misconduct spotlighted in the NCAA Infractions Report. Just like the real Selection Committee, I agonized over the seedings. Where, for example, to place violations related to the phony internship — in the YMCA or in Academic Shenanigans regional?

How to Secede from Government (Without Really Trying)

If trimming government waste is the goal, why not start by abolishing the state Senate?

Ever notice that when politicians talk about streamlining government, they tend to give their own arses a pass?